Comments or lack thereof

[author_by_night]

 Let's talk about comments. In an intentionally open post.  


I've noticed a tendency on LJ in the past few years for two things to be the case, and I think it's something a lot of us have fallen into. I'm very, very guilty of it myself, so I'll use myself as the prime example. 

Case 1: I read my  flist during lunch at work or school on my blackberry or a computer, but I don't comment. Sometimes I don't comment when I check at home either - too often, actually.

Case 2: I make a long post that I feel should merit some reply. Maybe it's a rant, maybe it's  quirky meta, maybe it's satire and/or snark, maybe it's just a really long post with a lot of thoughts - who knows? The point is, I post it, I'm glad I did... only to realize one person, if anyone, left a comment.

In the latter case, I feel like I'm being ignored. Every time it happens I'm less encouraged to post. Sometimes I've even said stuff that amounts to "... is anyone home?" And in the past few months, a lot of my friends on LJ have been saying the same thing.

The thing is, however, I check the comments I posted, and I'll have posted two a week. I have a pretty large flist - admittedly, a lot of people don't post that much, but still, I should be commenting more. If I feel ignored, why am I ignoring? 

I think that ultimately, there's a few problems with LJ that affect commenting. And I know from other entries I've read on my flist and personal conversations that I've had with people that it's not just me. So what's going on?

I think the first issue is other technology. With easier access to the internet outside of the home, it's more common for people like me to read their LJ flists... well, outside of our homes. But there's a reason we're not home to begin with; we have somewhere we're supposed to be or something we're supposed to do. I know I'll see that a friend has posted a fic, and I have every intention of reading it the second I get home - except by the time I get home six hours later, I've ranted about work, fed the cat, made dinner, and I completely forget about the fic I meant to review. Or the post I meant to comment on. It's the same reason I suck at replying to emails. 

And then there's the fact that I think the internet's tone has changed a little. I think that internet culture has become less about interaction and more about simply relaying ideas and experiences. On Facebook, a friend posted exciting news; instead of people saying "congratulations!" or "wow, that's great," they simply hit "LIKE." Although it may seem lazy, it's simply another way of patting someone on the back or grinning or whatnot. Sometimes people don't betray a lot in real life - I have friends who don't express much with words, but their facial expressions, gestures and other things express it all. Because you can't give someone a surprised look or apologetic look on Facebook, LIKE is one equivalent. And really, long before Facebook existed, forums had emoticons that pretty much did the same thing:

OP: I'm pregnant!

Ensemble: *Insert slew of emoticons here*

But LJ doesn't have such a function. You can type in :D and all that, of course, but it's not necessarily the same thing. So instead, it's easier to comment when you think of words. Which of course doesn't always happen. (Of course, there are always .gif images, but it's not automatic and... I don't know how it's done, my knowledge of online technology is pretty much stuck in 2002 or something, but it doesn't look easy.)

But you can't really LIKE or retweet on LJ. You can use :/ and :D but that's about it.  LJ users can post .gifs and cat macros, but those aren't part of the site. You have to know how to make/get/post a .gif or cat macro. Does the lack of a quick "hey cool" reply function affect comments? Perhaps somewhat. There isn't a way to say "hey, I just want you to know I read this but don't have a lot to say (or a lot of time to say anything) about it."

There's other small factors, of course. Sometimes, people just lose touch, the way they do in real life. Interests change, lives change... and while we all like to say "that won't matter," the reality is, sometimes it does. Maybe for petty reasons, maybe for reasons that make a lot of sense - either way, it happens.

All of this being said...I do think that if you want people to comment, it's only fair to comment as well. Often I post and don't get many comments, but then I realize either I haven't commented much myself lately, or I don't respond to comments when I do get them. It isn't fair to want things that you're not giving. Plus, isn't it only natural to pay more attention to someone whom you've been interacting with a lot lately? It isn't even something we give a lot of thought to - that's just how it happens.

Edit 1: I actually decided to flock this entry, only because I'm posting from work. As soon as I get a chance, probably this evening, I am going to deflock it.

Edit 2: And deflocked!

Comments

[13oct.livejournal.com]

As you know, I tend to post a lot. I love responding too, but have noticed the same thing that you are talking about. *shrugs* I love my flist and so yeah, will keep leaving comments even though I'm the only one most of the time. Which is kinda sad.

[author-by-night.livejournal.com]

I know what you mean. And you leave so many comments, too!

[bitchet.livejournal.com]

Hey, I just mentioned this as the thing that's killing fandom on LJ! I don't know if "like" would be an improvement though. Look at how controversial "kudos" is over on Ao3.

I don't know. Something is and has been changing with fandom and LJ is affected by it and I'm not sure why or if there is any one reason.

[author-by-night.livejournal.com]

I don't know. Something is and has been changing with fandom and LJ is affected by it and I'm not sure why or if there is any one reason.

I'm not sure how valid the following argument is, as I've only been in a few fandoms, most of them being quite small (Harry Potter was only big fandom), but it seems to me that fandom's just become a lot more meta. Look at A Very Potter Musical - there were actually people like Barbara the Wallpaper at Sugar Quill who wrote musical versions of the books, but those things were serious. Of course, filks were often more tongue-in-cheek, but not always. (Although maybe AVPM is partly serious too? I don't know that much about it, so forgive me if I have no idea what I'm talking about.) They also generally followed a timeline.

Ahem. My point is, I just think that a lot of fandoms aren't so much worried about speculation as they are fics and stuff anymore. I'm sure that does affect LJ; I've noticed numerous discussion posts where nobody has said anything, or replied to anyone's observation. That's if the community even has one. So there is definitely that.

[vytresna.livejournal.com]

Everything's become more meta. It's getting increasingly rare that people try to say something, online or off, without attaching a wry little wink to it. It annoys me deeply, and yet I still find myself doing it.

[daintress.livejournal.com]

It's true we don't comment as much as we should, and it's partially about time (what we OUGHT to be doing instead of reading LJ to begin with) and convenience. It' also about what's going on with each individual, too. My life is filled with a ridiculous amount of drama, suddenly. Makes me numb to everyone else's, so I tend to skim and not really reply. YOU are getting a reply just because of the topic...this is the closest I'll get to explaining why I have time to post daily, but no time to read other people's posts. Lol!

[author-by-night.livejournal.com]

Oh, I definitely understand where you're coming from! I hope I didn't guilt you into replying, though. You've been through a lot lately.

[daintress.livejournal.com]

Lol! Nah. I'd have to actually feel bad in order to be guilted into doing it. I don't really have the capacity for that right now. ;)

[r-a-black.livejournal.com]

I figure people do read my journal even if they don't comment. I know I don't always say things that make it easy for people to give constructive feedback, and I'm okay with that. Honestly, I don't like too much of, well, "liking" kind of interaction. It's not that it seems lazy to me, it seems impersonal. I do it, but I try not to do it too much. So in commenting, if I have something to say, I will, even if it's "I totally agree".

[author-by-night.livejournal.com]

I'm okay with "liking" mostly if it makes sense. I had a friend who posted some exciting news on Facebook, and I was the only one who bothered to actually reply - everyone else liked it. At the same time, if a friend said "I got new shoes," I don't know what to say to that, so I will often press "like." I'm glad she's happy, what else is there to say?

[r-a-black.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I agree with that much. If it's exciting news at least a "congrats!" is in order.

[secondmezzanine.livejournal.com]

I know how you feel. It sucks to post something you put thought into and get zero comments. I am guilty of not commenting if I read it on my phone or I just plain don't have anything to say. (Or if I disagree greatly with something but don't want to get into a conversation about it, I refrain as well.) I will say that the more comments I get from someone else, the more comments I'm likely to post on their journal in return.

[author-by-night.livejournal.com]

Yeah, exactly. I read on my phone way too often, and I think that's my biggest problem.

[sea_thoughts]

I think people are lazier because of Facebook and Tumblr. It's much easier to click 'Like' or post a GIF in response than to write something. :/

[author-by-night.livejournal.com]

That's true. I don't think it's all of it, but I do think Facebook has changed a lot about the way we interact on the internet. However, Facebook isn't always right.

[sea_thoughts]

No, it isn't. I dislike Facebook, I think it's made people lazier.

[scionofgrace.livejournal.com]

Ooo, color me guilty! I could definitely comment more.

I think your general statements are true. "Back in the day" (aka before Facebook, or even MySpace), the internet was dominated by people who communicated well by writing. Well, we were mostly geeks with time on our hands, and yeah, we had to use actual computers, and devote blocks of time to web-surfing, because otherwise there was no point in firing up the ol' CPU.

But now there are tons of people online who are not geeks, who don't have much time, who never learned the skill of maintaining entire friendships via the internet. And yeah, we're using phones and reading snatches during work/school/etc. (I've noticed that I write MUCH shorter tweets on my phone than on my laptop.)

For myself, though, one reason I don't post or comment so much partially because I'm building better RL relationships. A lot of the emotional energy I was pouring into LJ is being directed toward people I see face to face. Not that you guys aren't important! I care about what happens to all of you. It's just that LJ is no longer my main outlet.

[crackers4jenn.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I think people are a lot more mobile with the internet nowadays, reading it on their phones, and that seems to have made the frequency of comments drop. It takes more effort that way. Especially when you consider the popularity of Facebook, Twitter, and Tumblr, where you don't even NEED to comment, you just hit LIKE or REBLOG or RETWEET.

I am a lazy commenter, yet an obsessive reader of my flist. I don't plan on making the trek to Dreamwidth like a lot of users, so I definitely need to get better at interacting over here.

[dinpik.livejournal.com]

I don't comment a lot because a lot of times I feel like anything I say will be pointless; either I can't help with a situation, or I'll come across as mindlessly going "Cheer up!"