Writer's Block: Thanks for the Input

[author_by_night]

[Error: unknown template qotd]Oh, tons of pieces of advice could qualify,, LOL. One popular piece of advice that certainly comes to mind are those "I messages" - in other words, telling someone how you I really feel. 

In theory, 'I messages' are an effective problem solving tool, whether you're seven or eighty seven. But there's times when they should and shouldn't be used; it's so easy to say to someone "tell ___ how you feel", because we know what they just told us, and the words made us feel for them. But that party might not agree, or how the advicee reveals how they really feel might not be what you intended.  The fact of the matter is, our feelings are personal for a reason. I'm not saying anyone should hold things in - you have to tell people how you feel sometimes. But there's times, places, and ways to do it, even without those 'I messages.' (And don't use them on people who don't care how you feel, or possibly want you to have negative feelings. Been there, done that, still kick myself for it.)

I think in general though, all advice has the potential to be bad. It should be given and taken carefully, with context and stuff in mind too. (Whoops, is that advice?)

Comments

[ginny-toxic.livejournal.com]

Isn't the 'I message' about rewording what you're going to say more to 'I feel angry when you do that' instead of 'you're pissing me off' ? Or is that something else