Things Nobody Gets About Quiet People
Aug. 27th, 2013 08:15 am![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
author_by_nightThere's been a lot of stuff about introverts lately, so I figured I'd do my own post. With macros.
Things Nobody Gets About Quiet People
1. We're not necessarily that quiet. Close friends and relatives can often attest to the fact that we'll actually talk your ear off when enabled; in fact, some of that is why we're so quiet with people we don't know as well. People we've just met aren't yet accustomed to our tendency to not shut up for ten minutes.
2. We hate small talk. Oh, sure, we don't mind conversation starting small talk - we usually use it ourselves to get a conversation going. We didn't really mean to get you started on buying dishtowels for 10% off at Sears. Seriously, we were just being polite - damn it. We have no idea how other people either fake interest or manage to muster it themselves, but we need more substantial conversations than that.
3. You know how you see us all on our lonesome, drag us to join your friends, and then act like you have no idea why we're just standing/sitting there? It mostly happened in high school, but we've seen it happen in adulthood too. If you don't actually want us there, don't drag us in. Being ignored won't make us want to be more social.
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"Thanks for the... warm welcome?"
4. There's a difference between being standoffish and being quiet. Standoffish people just do not like you, because you are not on their list of Approved Social Life Candidates. Sorry. Quiet(ish) people like you enough, but we like taking the time to get to know you.
Enjoying a book on a sunny day? How standoffish!
5. We like having our personal space. Personal space is not the same thing as being disturbed; it just means we enjoy having time to ourselves. We like people. No, we love people. We also love a good book. And Wikipedia. When we're ready, we'll join the rest of the world quite happily.
... But if you get started on dishtowels again?
Things Nobody Gets About Quiet People
1. We're not necessarily that quiet. Close friends and relatives can often attest to the fact that we'll actually talk your ear off when enabled; in fact, some of that is why we're so quiet with people we don't know as well. People we've just met aren't yet accustomed to our tendency to not shut up for ten minutes.
2. We hate small talk. Oh, sure, we don't mind conversation starting small talk - we usually use it ourselves to get a conversation going. We didn't really mean to get you started on buying dishtowels for 10% off at Sears. Seriously, we were just being polite - damn it. We have no idea how other people either fake interest or manage to muster it themselves, but we need more substantial conversations than that.
3. You know how you see us all on our lonesome, drag us to join your friends, and then act like you have no idea why we're just standing/sitting there? It mostly happened in high school, but we've seen it happen in adulthood too. If you don't actually want us there, don't drag us in. Being ignored won't make us want to be more social.
"Thanks for the... warm welcome?"
4. There's a difference between being standoffish and being quiet. Standoffish people just do not like you, because you are not on their list of Approved Social Life Candidates. Sorry. Quiet(ish) people like you enough, but we like taking the time to get to know you.
Enjoying a book on a sunny day? How standoffish!
5. We like having our personal space. Personal space is not the same thing as being disturbed; it just means we enjoy having time to ourselves. We like people. No, we love people. We also love a good book. And Wikipedia. When we're ready, we'll join the rest of the world quite happily.
... But if you get started on dishtowels again?
