One shot

[author_by_night]

I wrote a one shot, but it doesn't look right to me... suggestions?

 

Title: Time Will Tell

Summary: Lily's thoughts over Sirius over the year.

Rating: PG

Ships: Lily/James

           

 

October 14th, 1971

"I hate you!"

"I hate you, and I hope your mother kicks you out of the house so we never have to see you again!"

Lily could hear shouting, though she didn't know what they were saying.

Black pulled his wand as the girl Lily thought was his cousin marched off, and suddenly, her long dark hair fell off, leaving the girl with only enough hair to cover her chin.

"Black!" Lily shrieked.

"Oh hell, it's the screech owl," Lily heard Black mutter as he turned. Lily briefly wondered where Potter, Pettigrew and Lupin were.

The girl turned, and glared at Sirius. "I am going to kill you for that!" She raised her wand.

"Perfictus Totalus," Black hissed and the girl fell to the ground, gasping in shock.

"You think you're so brave, don't you?" Lily snapped.

"Yeah, I do," Black said proudly.

 

June 16th, 1976

Lily slammed her dormitory door, and sat on her bed, infuriated.

"I hate Black and Potter," she muttered.

"They're not so bad," Sally Mason said casually. "I mean, they went a little far today, but you've got to admit, what upset you the most was that Potter was doing it."

"No," Lily said, shaking her head. "It wasn't. It was the look in Black's eyes. Potter's just a hot headed swot who probably thinks more about Quidditch than the fact that there's someone hanging upside down. Black is the one that scares me. He looked hungry."

Sally nodded. She had to admit, Lily had a point.

 

September 25th, 1976

"Black, what is going on?"

Lily had stopped Black, who'd been running after Potter. She couldn't let them run out of the Common Room after hours, and even if she hadn't been able to stop Potter, she could stop Black.

"Evans, let me go," Black panted. "Please. You don't understand."

"You'd better believe I don't," Lily said. "Why are you running out after hours?"

"Evans, please! Just let me go!"

"No!" Lily said sharply. "We're supposed to be in our Common Rooms these days, ever since the attack in Hogsmeade, which you know darn-"

"Look, if you don't let me go, Snape and James might die!"

Lily stared at Black, chills running down her spine. "Excuse me?"

“They might die,” Sirius repeated. “Evans, I made a mistake. I told Snape how to find – he’ll get killed.”

Lily stared for another minute, and then made a run for the Portrait Hole.

 

May 10^th, 1977

            “James?”

            Lily had seen James alone in Honeydukes, and knew now was the time.

            They’d formed a friendship after the Willow incident almost a year before; he had mellowed down a little, all of his friends had, not to mention saving a life.

            And not even bragging about it.

            Now, she had to tell him something important: that she loved him.

            “Yes, Lily?” James turned, grinning.

            “I-”

            “Prongs!” Black had rushed into the store, followed by Pettigrew, Lupin, and Lupin’s girlfriend, Monya Perkins.

            Lily sighed. She didn’t get how James could still speak to Black; he had never told her what exactly Black had done, but she wasn’t stupid.

            “James, we lost the Map,” Lupin said.

            James dropped the box of chocolates. “What?”

            Lily sighed, not knowing what they meant, nor caring. “I’ll catch you later, James.”

 

June 30^th, 1978

James put his arm around Lily as they headed towards the train. “Can you believe it? We’re no longer Hogwarts students!”

            Lily laughed. “You’ve mentioned it.”

            “So, do you want to sit with us? You can ask Despina, Sally, Carolyn and Gwen if they want to join,” James added. “I’d sit with you alone for the first half like I always do, but I do want to celebrate with my friends.”

            Lily sighed. “You can sit with them, and I’ll just – see you after.”

            “Lils, I want you with us,” James insisted. “You’re my girlfriend… you can’t avoid Sirius forever anyway, you know.”

            “No, I’m not,” Lily said quickly.

            James rolled his eyes. “Whatever you say. But… do this for me, okay? It would mean the world to me.”

            Lily felt a stab of guilt. She didn’t like Sirius, but that gave her no right to act as if she sometimes wished James would realize how insane he was, even if she did feel that way.

            “Okay,” Lily said. “I’ll go find my mates, and we’ll meet you.” But I don’t like it.

 

November 6^th

            Lily stood with the others, holding her hand up as she swore never to betray the secrets of the Order.

            She looked at Sirius, who was standing on the other side of James.

            Lily couldn’t help but wonder if Sirius was really on their side. True, he’d left his family, but he’d also tried to kill a fellow student. Not to mention the fact that she still remembered his pride at having put a hex on his cousin. Perhaps she’d deserved it, but really, an eleven year old boy shouldn’t want to do such a thing to someone.

            They sat down, Sirius sitting at the exact same second as James, and exchanging a grin with him. Lily felt the stab of guilt she always did when she realized that she hated her boyfriend’s brother.

            After all, James thought Sirius was the world. So why couldn’t she feel the same way?

 

April 15^th, 1980

             “Your parents are… dead.”

            Lily stared at Alice in shock. “Alice…”

            “We tried everything,” Alice said. “I’m so sorry. We really did.”

            Lily kept on staring.

            “Alice, get James,” Sirius said.

            “Do you want me to stay with-”

            “I couldn’t save them, the least I can do is help their daughter.”

            A piece of ice on Lily’s stomach melted, but the numbness returned before she could comprehend Sirius’s kind gesture.

            Sirius put his arm around Lily. “I’m sorry.”

            Lily began to sob, forgetting that she despised the person she was now holding onto.

 

February 5^th, 1981

            “We need to get him a Godfather, before we go into hiding,” James announced. “And a Godmother. Just… in case.”

            Lily sighed; she didn’t know if she was keen on the Godmother idea. She wanted someone she knew would be completely willing and able. Gwen wasn’t stable enough, not after her boyfriend’s death, Despina had little patience with children, and Lily hadn’t seen Carolyn or Sally much in years.

            “Just a Godfather,” Lily said.    

            “So Sirius?” James looked at her questioningly.

            Lily bit her lip. She was convinced he was on their side, and she was appreciative of him being there for her, but did she want Harry to be left with him, if anything happened to her and James?

            Then again… who else would it be? Remus probably wouldn’t be allowed, not to mention the fact that he’d been aloof lately, and Peter just did not seem to have parenting skills. He was always nervous around Harry.

            And would Sirius ever cause harm to Harry, James’s son? Not to mention that despite Sirius’s recklessness, he was the strongest person she knew.

            “Yes, let’s ask Sirius,” Lily smiled.

 

November 1^st, 1981

            “Lily! It’s him! Grab Harry and go!”

            Lily felt her heart race as she ran into Harry’s room.

            She tried to disapparate, but with a fall to the floor, remembered the anti-Apparation charms on the house. Why hadn’t they thought of this?

            Lily pulled out her wand. “Dumble-”

            “AVADA KEDAVRA!”

            Lily dropped her wand, her skin going cold.

            James.

            “Sirius, where are you when I need you?” Lily moaned.

            “Give me the boy.”