A Drabble Never Posted

[author_by_night]

At some point this past summer, not_last_resort requested a drabble. I wrote one, but for some reason it never got posted.

I found the drabble, but then I kept forgetting the notebook at work, and I don't really have LJ access at work anymore.

That's the story of the drabble never posted.

Onto the drabble itself!

Fandom: Firefly

Title: The Trouble With Wash: A Quartet

Author: author_by_night

Summary: When Mal meets a peculiar man named Wash, he is instantly pleased. He doesn't realize how quickly things will change.

Ships: Wash/Zoe.

I.

Mal liked Wash because Zoe didn't.

When Zoe had an irrational dislike for something or someone, it amused Mal because in the normal scheme of things, she was the controlled one. He reacted; she stood still, staring, ignoring. It took a lot for anyone to get much of a reaction out of Zoe. War did that to a person.

Mal liked seeing her react so strongly to something so petty. It made him feel normal.

II.

Mal didn't like Wash because Zoe loved him.

Bester said it was because Mal loved her, but that wasn't strictly true. He supposed a person could describe his feelings towards her as a brother to a sister, but Mal had never been a fan of sentiment. He stuck with rationalizing that he cared about Zoe, but that didn't mean he loved her.

Mal felt Wash had violated a strict code, and Zoe had followed in a rare act of defiance. It was not that Mal did not want Zoe to be happy; he merely did not want their love to interfere with their jobs. And he knew it would - blind passion always interfered, whether it was the blind passion towards another human being, the blind passion towards a nonexistent God, or the blind passion towards a corrupt government.

Besides, what would become of the atmosphere were Wash and Zoe to break up? Or worse, have children? Mal didn't have time to buy diapers.

III.

Mal loved Wash because he loved Zoe.

Mal had been the one who recruited Zoe; back then, she'd been a young, optimistic woman who smiled a lot and wore her hair down and even owned a dress, though she rarely wore it. The war had soon turned her into a stoic woman who had aged from twenty to forty within a year, who never laughed but never cried either. She just existed.

Mal had gotten used to it, and it was only when Zoe married Wash that he remembered.

Although he never admitted it, he loved hearing Zoe laugh and caress carefree hands in her husband's hair. He loved seeing Zoe smile just because someone she loved entered the room.

Mal never realized until their wedding day how much he'd missed that side of her.

IV.

Mal hated Wash because he'd hurt Zoe in the worst possible way.

It was irrational, boyish even; it was not like Wash had chosen to die. He'd even died doing what he loved, which Mal knew was comfort to Zoe.

But nobody hurt Mal's crew, even a member of Serenity itself, without being host to Mal's anger.

Zoe shed no tears in front of them, but River told him she cried in her sleep. Mal knew she was right, and would have known even if she'd never said anything. He was not as clueless when it came to emotions as people seemed to think.

Mal mourned the man who had guided Serenity, but he found it near impossible to forgive the man who had broken Zoe's heart.

Comments

[ehnel.livejournal.com]

Amy, I really liked this!

I know you were worried about Mal's characterisation but I thought you really carried him off here. You showed many aspects of his character (plus lots of sweet little insights into Wash, Zoe and Wash-and-Zoe). Some of the lines (diapers!) were funny, while the final quarter of this drabble was sad, so there was a lovely (and well-expressed) range of emotions.

The third section was the weakest, I thought: possibly because the dresses-and-smiles side of Zoe is semi-invisible in the canon itself, so it is very hard to know how to write it. All the same I liked the way you imagined Mal reacting to the dresses-and-smiles.

Overall, excellent stuff!

[scionofgrace.livejournal.com]

Thank you. This is beautiful. The family feeling on Serenity is so strong, and you've caught it here.

[secondmezzanine.livejournal.com]

This was really sweet! Except of course that the end is so sad. :(

[jncar.livejournal.com]

That was really good! I thought it was a great take on Mal's characterization, and on Zoe's. And it made me all teary-eyed at the end, because it felt so true. Thanks for posting this. :)

[ronluvshermione.livejournal.com]

Nooo! I live in a world where Wash is not dead!! *runs away and hides*

Seriously, that is very nice. It's been a while since I've read fic.

[daintress.livejournal.com]

I adore this! :D

Have you seen V? Wash and Inara are both in it. Lol!