Amanda: a kid should be able to invite who she wants to to her birthday party, though most parents I know try to make sure everyone is included. Why Mrs. Henderson would allow this to go on during class time, I don't know--but not because of whatever damage it would do to the other students, but because class time is for being in class. If there's allotted free time or recess or whatever, sure, let Amanda do her thing. She'll probably bring cupcakes for everyone, anyway.
Mr. Cole should make a practice of picking teams himself or having kids count off. A lot of times in gym class, our teams would rotate halfway through the period. But occasionally letting kids pick teams is normal and, I think, appropriate.
In both of these situations, in my eyes, the onus is on the kid's parents to emphasize that this sort of thing is not a big deal. Maybe Dennis is nearsighted and can't hit a beach ball with a baseball bat, but runs like hell and will kick ass on the track team once he hits high school. Maybe he'll be hilarious and the kid everyone likes to be in class with. If Amanda doesn't invite you to her party, well, okay, you didn't like Amanda that much anyway, and Chuck E. Cheese is boring. When you have a small child that falls down, they tend to make as big a deal of it as you do. If you kiss it better and end it there, the kid generally will, too. If you fuss and flip out, so will the kid. The same is true once they start to get older.
If Mrs. Gordon is letting children pick their own groups for any project larger than two people, she is a nut.
If a parent raises an issue about Harry Potter, the teacher should certainly address it, but until that point, just run with it.
If people want to pray in schools, they should be able to. If they don't want to, they shouldn't. But I don't have a problem with a school setting aside a moment of reflection for people to do with as they please--pray, meditate, cram for a Spanish quiz, whatever.
Our student government certainly did things, but no one really cared about who won or lost, so I don't see that as being that big a deal.
As far as bullying, of course the schools need to be involved, but I said 'only in terms of common sense.' By that, I mean that everyone needs to realize that all kids will not get along, all kids will not like each other, and that's that. If things get physical or cruel, that's one thing. But if a kid is running to the principal's office every other day saying, "Johnny called me a jerk!", well, that kid needs to learn to let things go.
I'm a pretty tough customer, which comes with distance, I think. But anyone I know now that holds a grudge going back to high school or before comes off as someone that just can't let things go. People grow up and change. Does it make it okay to treat someone cruelly over and over? Absolutely, certainly, no. But everyone at some point is going to be called a bitch or an asshole or be made fun of--it's the great equalizer in growing up. Everyone's goofy-looking and awkward in middle school, and no one has fond memories of it. That's just how it is.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2006-08-10 03:53 am (UTC)Mr. Cole should make a practice of picking teams himself or having kids count off. A lot of times in gym class, our teams would rotate halfway through the period. But occasionally letting kids pick teams is normal and, I think, appropriate.
In both of these situations, in my eyes, the onus is on the kid's parents to emphasize that this sort of thing is not a big deal. Maybe Dennis is nearsighted and can't hit a beach ball with a baseball bat, but runs like hell and will kick ass on the track team once he hits high school. Maybe he'll be hilarious and the kid everyone likes to be in class with. If Amanda doesn't invite you to her party, well, okay, you didn't like Amanda that much anyway, and Chuck E. Cheese is boring. When you have a small child that falls down, they tend to make as big a deal of it as you do. If you kiss it better and end it there, the kid generally will, too. If you fuss and flip out, so will the kid. The same is true once they start to get older.
If Mrs. Gordon is letting children pick their own groups for any project larger than two people, she is a nut.
If a parent raises an issue about Harry Potter, the teacher should certainly address it, but until that point, just run with it.
If people want to pray in schools, they should be able to. If they don't want to, they shouldn't. But I don't have a problem with a school setting aside a moment of reflection for people to do with as they please--pray, meditate, cram for a Spanish quiz, whatever.
Our student government certainly did things, but no one really cared about who won or lost, so I don't see that as being that big a deal.
As far as bullying, of course the schools need to be involved, but I said 'only in terms of common sense.' By that, I mean that everyone needs to realize that all kids will not get along, all kids will not like each other, and that's that. If things get physical or cruel, that's one thing. But if a kid is running to the principal's office every other day saying, "Johnny called me a jerk!", well, that kid needs to learn to let things go.
I'm a pretty tough customer, which comes with distance, I think. But anyone I know now that holds a grudge going back to high school or before comes off as someone that just can't let things go. People grow up and change. Does it make it okay to treat someone cruelly over and over? Absolutely, certainly, no. But everyone at some point is going to be called a bitch or an asshole or be made fun of--it's the great equalizer in growing up. Everyone's goofy-looking and awkward in middle school, and no one has fond memories of it. That's just how it is.