Yes, I definitely get that first one, one of mine is to do with the fact that while I also desire to keep the peace, for my own mental health I can't step in with my family (Uncle "Dudley D" has been barely speaking to the other two siblings for the last 4 years, my cousin's husband has been trying to persuade them to reconcile, but after past experiences of being expected to be go between against my will I can't do it any more).