author_by_night: (Pawnee sign by nuv0le_rapide)
But for now, I'll settle for .gifs and texts.

(A fangirl political parody)


Read more... )Seriously though, anyone know how to make this a fanvid? Because it needs to be a thing.
author_by_night: (Sarcasm by justbolognese)
1. Assume everyone is Them

We all know that conversation. The one that has to happen.

"I'm so sick of Insert Religious Group Here blathering all the time. All they do is ring doorbells and speak tongues at you."

"...I'm a Religious Group."

"... hey, I didn't mean you! You don't even know how to ring a doorbell! I mean... can I get you some wine?"

Be awkward no more! Instead, skirt around the issue and make sure they're not the group you don't like because you assume (correctly, of course) that they must all be the same way.

"Hey, so, what do you think about being part of Religious Group? You seem like an okay person, so I'm guessing they're not all crazy? Wait, you ARE one of Them, right? Or am I thinking of someone else?"

That is guaranteed to go over much better.

2. Literally Shove Things Down People's Throats

People are sick of you, metaphorically speaking, shoving politics and religion down their throats. Let's face it - no matter how much you post "if 'Under God' were still in the Pledge of Allegiance, misinformation wouldn't happen", people aren't going to convert.

Solution? Get literal - with candy and chocolate!

There's tons of candy and and chocolate out there that subtly sends out the message you're trying to relay. Religious texts, Jesus (you can get His face on grilled cheese sandwiches, too), flags from your country, you name it! Deliver it to them with a coy smile. You'll have successfully shoved your beliefs down their throats without them immediately realizing what you've done. It'll all sink in eventually.

3.  Be Always!Right

Never fact check anything. This will only ensure that sometimes, you may have to admit you could wrong, or that someone else might have a point. That would be just awful! It's best to assume you're right - about everything. Don't check anything. If you don't immediately notice that you have a message on your phone, don't check it. If you're leaving the house, don't make sure the door's locked properly. If you're driving, don't check the gas. There's definitely a tow company nearby. What could possibly go wrong with being always!right?

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